Jogged for 3:05, Walked for 6
Thank you all for your kind comments on my blog yesterday. I think yesterday was kind of a breakthrough for me.
It has made me wonder why I am so fearful of this journey. Why does the idea of jogging for any greater increase in minutes scare me? That just doesn't make any sense ... it's what I want. I want to be able to jog and jog and be able to feel like I could jog forever. I have heard it is a wonderful, powerful feeling. But the idea of jogging 3:30, 4:00, 7:00 ... and 15:00??? What?!? I feel a panic deep in my stomach at the idea. But why??
It feels like I AM running, but not in the right kind of way. I'm running away from running ... ? Now, Auburn, that just doesn't make sense, girlie.
When I am actually jogging, all the worries of the world, of my job, of everything, slips from my mind momentarily. I just think of putting one foot in front of the other ... and only thinking about that slow-moving clock on the display screen. :)
But then I dread the next jog. I fear that I won't be able to do it. Why? Why do you do that, Auburn? So what if you can't jog for three minutes or whatever! Bet you could tomorrow, so just try today.
I feel like a fricken dual personality, and one half of my personality is a real Debbie Downer. And I feel like I keep grabbing her by the shoulders and keep giving her a good shake, and she just keeps moaning and crying about stuff.
Sorry for all the talking out loud. I am hoping that I will have an epiphany ... but not yet ...
So, for my stats tonight, as promised, I jogged 3:05, walked for 6. I went 2.200 miles, burned 362 calories, and it took me 51:00.
So... there may not be a jog tomorrow. I'm pulling a 12 hour day (7:00-7:00). Goodie. Yay for Open Houses! Blegh.
So ... if anyone can shed some light on my duality, I'd appreciate it. I don't want to be scared of the Mile.
Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself." But he never had to run a mile.
Tacky, tacky.
Posted in: Debbie Downer, dual personality, FDR, fear on Wednesday, August 26, 2009 at at 9:15 PM 3 comments
